Our Thoughts Don't Change So We Don't Either

When checking different sources on the number of thoughts we have on any given day, most resources say we have between 50,000 and 70,000 thoughts per day.  What is even more astonishing is that researchers say that upwards of 90% of those thoughts are exactly the same ones we had the day before!  This would imply that we are very routine, habitual creatures.  If we think the same things, it would follow that we do the same things too – day, after day, after day, after day.  Oh, my goodness…this is downright boring and no wonder we fall into “the daily grind!”

Think about it.  Don’t you have the same morning routine, the same routine driving to work, the same routine at work, after work, and perhaps your nighttime ritual as well?  If we want to start something different in our lives, it will feel very foreign to us initially.  These foreign thoughts are not part of our 90% repetition!  It will not be part of our everyday habits as mentioned. We will have to make these new thoughts part of our new way of thinking and incorporate them into our existing habits until they feel “normal” to us. How many of us have started a new diet or new exercise routine only to drop it very quickly after it began?  It wasn’t “normal” to us.  It didn’t “feel” right at first.  And then, we quickly fell back into our “normal” routine that we have lived day upon day, week upon week, month upon month, year upon year…  To stick with something new we need to do it long enough for it to become a habit.  I remember reading Dr. Andrew Weil’s works, and he alluded to it taking on average eight weeks for something to become a permanent change in our lives.

" If we instead, train our minds to focus on the 10 really awesome things that happened today, we will stay in a more positive mood, which invokes more positive thoughts, which in turn makes it easier to take on and stick to more positive actions in our life."

Knowledge does not equate to change in behavior.  I know I should eat right and exercise, yet I will still reach for a bag of chips and a living room chair.  I am far more apt to reach for the negative foods and the negative behavior patterns when I am in a stressful negative situation.  If ten really awesome things happened to you today, and one bad one – what do you think we tend to focus on?  If you said the one bad one, you are right!  If we instead, train our minds to focus on the 10 really awesome things that happened today, we will stay in a more positive mood, which invokes more positive thoughts, which in turn makes it easier to take on and stick to more positive actions in our life.  Doing this will feel foreign to you at first I promise – especially if it isn’t part of your normal, habitual way of thinking.  However, doing this brings about new neuro-pathways that bring about new positive habits.  For the next seven days, notice your daily routine.  Pay attention to your thought focus over the next seven days as well.  Are you quick to focus on the negative things that happen to you or are you able instead to focus on the positive?  Are you a creature of habit and are those habits serving your highest good? 

Remember always that you are worthy, you are lovable, and you deserve goodness in your life!

You Are Seven Foot Tall and Green

If I were to say to you right here, right now, that “you are seven foot tall and green,” you would assess what I said against your own “is it true (???) inner filter”, determine very quickly that you are not seven foot tall nor are you green, and the comment would roll off you like water off a duck’s back.  However, if I instead said “you are stupid and you are ugly” you might hear what I said and think something like “I am stupid when it comes to math. I barely squeaked by in algebra.” Or, “I have made some really stupid choices in my life.”  Or you may say to yourself “You know, it was harder for me to get a date than my friends to the prom. I think it is because the other girls were prettier than me.” Or “the ten pounds I just put on does make my clothes fit a little tighter.”

When I made these very insensitive statements to you, you may very well be a genius and a beauty queen. But depending on who I am to you – your friend, your sister, your mother, or a total stranger, you are more or less willing to accept what I said as the truth. However, the ultimate gauge you use as the filter as to whether or not you believe the statement lies with your own self-esteem, your own self-assessment, and your own self-talk. The next time someone makes an insensitive comment to you, don’t let it through your filter. Don’t start down the path of your own negative self-talk. Instead, just replace their comment with “oh, they just told me I was seven foot tall and green.”

Remember always that you are worthy, you are lovable, and you deserve goodness in your life!